This phenonmena happened again this past weekday evening when I gagged myself awake (I've been throwing up in my mouth lately and it tends to happen only in my sleep) and tried not to spew a biley mess (no relation to Miley Cyrus) all over the bed or wall. After choking for a bit, I noticed that the ever-popular Poker After Dark was on NBC. First of all, it sounds like a low-budget porn title featuring an all African-American cast. Secondly, why would anyone want to watch poker on television? I figured that most people see poker as a great game to play, and boring to watch. Maybe that's why it's on at 2:30AM.
Anyway, let's get to the subject of the post. I noticed that Jennifer Tilly was on the show playing not as the celebrity guest, but as an actual professional poker player. I guess it doesn't take much to be considered a professional.
I think it may now just be a declaration. I took "professional poker player" to be a college-dropout who lives in mom's basement and spends his free time masturbating to broadband speed porn. You know Jennifer from such films as Liar, Liar, Bride of Chucky and the voice of Joe Swanson's wife, Bonnie on Family Guy. She got into poker because she is dating another professional poker player (and former broadband porn spanker) Phil Laak. Never heard of him? Yeah, I guess poker players aren't in it for the fame. Of course Ms. Tilly had her huge boobs hanging out of a dress and was the only female player at the table. It took me awhile to figure out it was her because she was using a voice I had never heard before. It sounded normal! It wasn't a Fran Drescher, Roseanne hybrid mutant voice. It was refreshing. The refreshment I felt soon turned to irritation because I spent the rest of the episode not only counting the number of times the guy next to her was checking out her rack (14), but why on Earth she would use that annoying voice as an actress? The best answer I could come up with is that she isn't a talented actress and needed something that would distinguish her from other no-talent-big-breasted actresses. So she took the annoying voice route. Over the years, she's offered her voice for a number of roles and you can always tell it is her. I just thought that it was her normal voice. I guess I should pay more attention.
I've run out of things to say about this. I realize this may not be important to you, but it's kind of like finding out your dad was never really your dad. He just stayed at the house to fix the car and grumble about the coloreds (for my Canadian viewership that's going to be "coloureds"). Yeah, my dad was born in the 30's. Before people trusted African Americans to piss and shit in the same area as the white folk. Yep, now I've totally lost my train of thought. What was this entry about?
Seriously, you couldn't let the black people wait with you?
