day 02 - your least favorite song

Can we just call this what it is? "The song that whenever you hear it you want to kill everybody in sight." Everybody has one. That tune that you can't stand for whatever reason. The singer's voice is annoying. The music video is offensive. You hear it too much. Somebody you hate loves it. It brings up bad memories.

The song I selected was easy to think of. It was the clear winner. Hands down, no question.

Song: Hey, Soul Sister
Artist: Train
Album: Save Me, San Francisco
Year: 2010

Hey-ay! Hey-ay-ay-ay-ay!

Maybe it was the fuckin' commercial (F-U Samsung) that featured this un-Godly tone. Maybe it was that first scream. It was definitely overplayed. That first retarded scream puts the entire song into my head. If I hear it on the radio, I'm like a super ninja trying to turn the station. It's too late. By the time you hear Hey-ay, it's like I've already heard the whole song. Then I'm listening to a different song, but all I can do is sing the Train-wreck mockingly.

The easiest way to get me to commit homicide would be to give me courtside seats to Lakers vs. Blazers in another Game 7, have Kobe hit the winning shot at the buzzer, then have the Rose Garden play Hey, Soul Sister as the Lakers celebrate at mid-court, right in front of my seat. There'd be a funeral for someone and...I don't even know. I'd be unable to stand trial and be locked up in the mental ward of the state hospital.

Apparently, I'm alone in thinking this P.O.S. song is worth anybody's time or money because it was the top-selling song on iTunes in 2010. Are you kidding me? Hey-ay! That's everybody's new favorite song. The only way this song could get worse is if they start playing it in my place of employment. I will break every speaker in the building if this happens. And I know it will. I'm just waiting in the corner with a sledgehammer waiting for that famous first note.